Happy Glastonbury weekend everyone! What a year it’s been already. 12-hour traffic jams, knee-deep mud, even a quite tragic death overshadowed by the EU referendum; all to be floated along last night with the quite depressing and frustrating set from Adele last night (25th June).
I seem to remember publishing a blog post around three months ago, based around my thinking that the Eavis family had been quite lazy with their bookings for the headline slots on the Pyramid Stage this year. I wasn’t too impressed by the thought of Muse performing yet again, and Coldplay performing yet again. However, Muse stormed it on Friday night and I’m optimistic that Chris Martin and the boys will do the same again this evening (26th June).
With this, I was quite prospective about the Adele concept. It was going to be interesting and a massive event at least. However, watching it was like watching a mixture of childrens’ programmes on CBBC. Selfie-posing, bringing children up on stage and asking them about their lives, endless boring and unfunny ‘anecdotes’ between songs that became incredibly frustrating and didn’t seem like they were going to end. I swear that she could have crammed in about six or seven more songs if only she just shut up for a moment. There was surely a lot of watch-checking in that field and even on that stage from the rest of her band last night. The crowd seemed to love it, but I doubt they’d seen the likes of Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band, Blur or Stevie Wonder perform on the very same stage in previous years.
It also made me think about that recent massive UK tour she’s only just completed. I mean, how much were tickets? Stretching to £80? £80 to see her perform her tear-jerking ballads and unnecessarily swear and mess up the starts of songs. Yeah, because apparently she’s so ‘normal’ and ‘relatable’ and it’s just really hilarious ‘cos she’s Adele’. No my friends, this is not the case. You would never see Paul McCartney start a song again after a mistake. He wouldn’t make a mistake regardless because he’s such a fantastic musician, but he’s also far more professional than Adele in every sense.
Hours before Adele took to the stage last night, the presenters of the Glastonbury coverage on BBC2 had been told that Adele had ‘been to Tesco’ before her set, apparently highlighting the fact that she’s such a ‘normal’, ‘everyday’ woman. The fact that that becomes material for the presenters shows that she in fact really isn’t a normal, everyday woman. Such a load of rubbish. She’s a multi-millionaire and one of the biggest names in contemporary pop music, she is not like the rest of us.
Then there’s the whole concept of her headlining the biggest festival stage on a Saturday night. Yes, I’ll repeat that, a Saturday night. If I was there this year, I would have gone to see New Order on the Other Stage. I very much doubt that Adele heart-wrenchingly singing ‘Do Y0u Remember?’ and ‘Someone Like You’ is going to gear you up for a big night ahead. I’d probably have gone back to camp to slit my wrists after her set. The Eavis’ made a real dog’s dinner of the Saturday night programme. The Sunday? Fair enough. But Christ alive, not the bloody Saturday night.
One of the other things that really annoyed me about the set was the reaction from Mark Radcliffe and Jo Whiley afterwards. I understand that they have to praise the performance while they’re broadcasting live to the public. They can’t exactly say ‘well, that was a proper bag of shit wasn’t it’, but the crap they were coming out with was laughable. They were claiming that there was a real connection with the crowd, the most connected performer with a crowd they’d ever seen at the festival. If you’re talking and chatting away for hours on end, then of course there’s going to be more of a ‘connection’ as they said. Some of the music is so dull that people will switch off. I honestly felt like I was watching ‘Live At The Apollo’ at some points, but one of those really bad comedians that get one chance and don’t get invited back again.
It was just really frustrating, I wanted to hear more of the songs. Only fifteen songs were performed. Fifteen songs for a Glastonbury headline set is woeful. What a waste of time, effort and money. Gorillaz performed twenty-three brilliants songs when they had to fill in for U2 six years ago but didn’t get half the praise that Adele inevitably will.
The thing is, believe it or not from this rant, I actually quite like Adele’s music. ’21’ is a great album when you’re in the mood and there’s no denying that she’s a phenomenal talent. Best voice in the country without a doubt. It was just far too much of her big over-egged personality right in your face. I also felt that the songs weren’t amplified as much as they could have been. ‘Rolling In The Deep’ was definitely the musical highlight. It’s a massive-sounding song anyway but the new songs sounded dull and flat. Quite frankly disappointing.
In all fairness, it must be a bit of a difficult conundrum for Adele. She’s so huge now that she has to cater for all audiences, whether they be young, middle-aged or elderly. That is why last night she was posing for selfies whilst simultaneously swearing about the mud and bitching about her ex. The pressure must have been immense. I honestly reckon that if she performed at Sheffield City Hall, it would have worked better than it did at Glastonbury Festival in front of hundereds of thousands of people and millions more on TV.
So to round this rant off, I’m begging the Eavis family to just think before they book these acts. It really didn’t work, she was annoying and I’m pretty certain that some of the crowd would have thought the same.
Enjoy Coldplay tonight all, cheers.